Heero and the destruction of Wizardry
by Kawsek
Summary: Heero and co. accidentally end up in the world of Harry Potter and eventually kills everyone. But, with all the wizards dead, how do they get home? Chapter 5 is finally up! Please Read and Review!
1. just putting everyone where they belong

Actually, I was reading fanfiction.net when the idea for this story hit me like a block on the head. Hope ya like it!(^-^)  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam nor do I own Harry Potter. But damn, GUNDAM ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Chapter 1: Just placing everyone where they should be first.  
  
Somewhere in a magical world where boys named Lia could change into kawaii wolves...  
  
The red-hooded figure put the last ingredient in the cauldron. She looked up to her beloved teacher as the green-haired wizard nodded in approval. Chacha looked nervously at the concoction and started to mumble the magic words...  
  
" I SUMMON GUNDAM TO THE MAGICAL SCHOOL!!!!!"  
  
The two (three including Elizabeth) ducked for cover as the hut exploded into ashes.  
  
"If everything goes as planned then, we'll be able to meet Gandalf the white sometime soon!" said Serabi with a smile.  
  
"I'll be glad to meet him!" (err...) "says" Elizabeth.  
  
"You did say the exact words for summoning, right Chacha?"  
  
"I... think I did..." said Chacha.  
  
"You DID say, "I summon Galdalf to the magical world", right Chacha?"  
  
"Um... was that Gandalf or Gundam?"  
  
"Gandalf."  
  
"..."  
  
"Oh shit."  
  
Sometime in the future, where 15-year old boys get to pilot huge machines of mass destruction and where pink limousines are annoyingly present...  
  
Quatre sat on the couch, tuning his violin. Wufei was near the fireplace, sharpening his katana (again and again and again... a katana can never be too sharp!). Heero was seated beside the table, doing whatever-knows-what on his beloved laptop. Trowa was cleaning his flute. Duo was doing all the talking. All of the first 4 mentioned gboys were trying hard NOT to strangle Duo... Unsuccessfully. Just as Heero couldn't take it anymore and reached for his gun, a big purple portal appeared.  
  
"WHAT THE FU-" screamed Duo as he got sucked into what looked like an exploded grape.  
  
Heero snatched his gun as he too, got turned to the purple light.  
  
"What type of judgement have we come across?" said Wufei while STILL sharpening his katana as he got sucked in.  
  
"We better follow them Trowa." Said Quatre.  
  
"Worried?"  
  
"No. It's just that Duo forgot his straightjacket." Quatre holds up a straightjacket as if it's entirely normal.  
  
"Let's go. Hell knows what he could do to wherever and whenever he turns up."  
  
And the last follow into the purple portal.  
  
  
  
In a certain school somewhere in England (Scotland?)...  
  
Harry Potter and Ron Weasley are seated on nice, big fluffy cushions...  
  
...  
  
...  
  
but you don't want to know what shit happened to them, do you?  
  
...  
  
let's get back to the gboys instead.  
  
The Purple portal faded, and the gboys found themselves in a strange castle, facing a guy with a beard so long Duo was itching to braid it.  
  
"Welcome, Gundam pilots, welcome to Hogwarts." Said Dumbledore.  
  
BANG!  
  
Heero took out his gun and shot Dumbledore. The very, ( very, very, and once more, VERY) very old school principal dropped dead.  
  
"Holy shit! Heero, you just killed Dumbledore!" shouted Trowa.  
  
"...so?"  
  
(I dunno HOW Trowa knew about Dumbledore okay!? Don't flame me!)  
  
"Duo, what are you doing?" asked Wufei (STILL sharpening his katana.)  
  
"I'm braiding his beard."  
  
All: "...oooooooooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkkkkaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy..."  
  
"OMG!!!!!!"  
  
A startled scream came out from behind the 5 (not so...) innocent boys. A girl with light brown long messy hair fainted at the sight of the dead Dumbledore, while two boys, one with messy black hair and glasses, and the other with red hair and freckles, stared at the Gundam pilots in shock. All three of them were wearing black dresses. (we're looking at the gboy's points of view, so technically, we can't call them robes.) Heero raised his gun and pointed it at the three children.  
  
BANG! BANG!  
  
BANG!  
  
"Expe-"  
  
BANG!  
  
"Heero! You just shot Harry Potter and co. and Mc.Gonagall!" Shouted Duo.  
  
"hnm."  
  
"I think we know now why there are no existing wizards nor witches in the future." Sighed Quatre.  
  
"Wufei, watch over everything while Duo and I look for someone who could help us get back to the future."  
  
"What about me?" asked Heero  
  
"And why you and Duo?" asked Wufei.  
  
"...I think it's best if you stay here. You have a tendency to point your gun at anything." Said Trowa.  
  
"And because Quat and I are the most normal people in the group." Said Duo.  
  
"That is unjustified. Of course people would notice an overgrown clown with a 3 foot braid." Said Wufei.  
  
"Yeah, and I don't suppose anyone would notice a chinese dude in white pajamas sharpening a katana, a stoic japanese in spandex with a look that could literally kill, and a 6 foot circus dude who uses too much hair gel."  
  
"omae o korosu"  
  
"Just give a bang if something happens okay?" Quatre grabbed Duo to shut him up, and smiled at the three annoyed people.  
  
"mission accepted."  
  
Will the gundam boys ever find their way back home? Why is Duo always the strange one? Will Quatre survive without tea? Till next time!  
  
Okay okay, it's corny, but PLEASE DON'T FLAME ME!!!!!! REVIEW!!!!!!!! 


	2. Whats up with them?

Yey I got reviews! I got reviews! So here's the 2nd part of "Heero and the destruction of wizardry"! Im so happy I got reviews... sniff...  
  
Disclaimer: I wish I owned gundam wing, but I don't. All I know is Im glad not to be JK Rowling. Did anyone tell you Im insane?  
  
Warnings: watch out for complete insanity and a little corny jokes.  
  
Heero and the Destruction of wizardry part 2  
  
We go to our hero's, who were accidentaly teleported to the magical school of Hogwarts, we find Quatre and Duo still looking for any signs of life, unsuccessfully...  
  
Quatre and Duo roamed around the castle of hogwarts for a while, Duo occasionally tinkering with some unknown magical item and exploding it, and Quatre trying to stay as far away from the explosions as humanly possible.  
  
"don't you think it's a little weird duo? It seems as if no one is around." Said Quatre after Duo exploded his nth magical item.  
  
"Nah. They're probably just scared of the GOD OF DEATH!"  
  
"Duo, I don't think anyone's ever heard of us in this era."  
  
"You mean I don't have a fan club here?"  
  
Quatre sighed. It wasn't bad enough that they can't find anyone who could be of any assistance right now, but Quatre had a sudden yearning for some tea. How typical of Duo to think of such things at crucial times such as these. He looked around again for any signs of life.  
  
"hmm..."  
  
Quatre heard a voice. He followed it until he spotted a small boy, whimpering behind a statue.  
  
"Hello there. We were just wondering, is there anyone here we could talk to...?" asked Quatre, extending his hand out to the poor boy. The boy started to whimper some more and cringed at the touch of Quatre's hand.  
  
"DON'T KILL ME!!! IM SORRY IF I CAME IN YOUR WAY JUST PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!!!!!" The boy screamed. Quatre looked confused.  
  
Duo looked down at the trembling wizard, picked him up, and started walking.  
  
"Duo, where are you taking him?" asked Quatre.  
  
"To Trowa. He'll make him talk."  
  
Quatre nodded and follwed suit. All the while the boy was screaming "I DONT WANT TO DIE!!! IM TOO YOUNG TO DIE!!!"  
  
Quatre and Duo turned the corner to where the other three gundam boys were located, to be greeted by the sight of blood and bodies strewn over the hallway floor.  
  
"Wufei! What happened here!?"  
  
Wufei turned towards Quatre's voice. And pointed at Heero, who was now cleaning his gun.  
  
"Heero! Don't tell me you killed the whole Hogwarts population!?"  
  
"..."  
  
"I won't tell you then."  
  
"sigh"  
  
"Uh, Quat, we've got a problem here." Said Duo.  
  
The boy had fainted, and was now unconsciously wetting his black dress. (we're still looking from the gboy's point of view here, so we still can't call them robes. Sorry. DON'T FLAME ME!!!!!!!!) Duo dropped the boy, wiping his hands on the wall.  
  
"That is gross! This is SO NOT COOL!" Duo kept complaining. Everyone listened for a while until it started to get boring.  
  
"Omae o korosu." Heero pointed his gun at Duo. Duo shut up.  
  
"what do we do now?" asked Wufei.  
  
"I guess we wait until the boy wakes up then. Where's Trowa?" asked Quatre.  
  
"He went to scan the area."  
  
"Im back." Said Trowa, popping up from the corner.  
  
"How are the grounds?"  
  
"completely silent. I think Heero killed almost every last student and teacher in the school." Trowa turned his head towards the boy who fainted.  
  
"Who's he?"  
  
"I don't know, but we were hoping that you could interrogate him once he wakes up." Said Quatre.  
  
Trowa nodded and leaned against the wall. Heero continued cleaning his gun. Wufei took his place beside Trowa and Duo started braiding the corpse's hairs. Quatre sighed and left the corridor, now in the hope of searching for the kitchen.  
  
"maybe they have some tea there..."  
  
Somewhere in the land of red hoods and pink hair...  
  
"okay Chacha, remember the counterspell. Nelenasendotomagiculskol"  
  
"okay, I get it now teacher serabi."  
  
"and get it right this time, or who knows what will happen, this counterspell can only be used once, okay chacha?"  
  
"Don't worry teacher serabi! Ill get it right this time!"  
  
Serabi took cover behind his bed (just in case) and signalled for chacha to begin the spell. The cute red hooded witch nodded and threw in the last ingredient of the potion.  
  
"RELENASENDTOMAGICALSCHOOL!"  
  
The green-haired teacher sweatdropped.  
  
BOOM!!!!!!!!  
  
The hut exploded into ashes.  
  
"did I do it right this time, teacher serabi?"  
  
"Chacha?"  
  
"?"  
  
"You're grounded."  
  
"hai."  
Back to After Colony at the sanq kingdom...  
  
Relena Peacecraft sat in her office, humming to the tune of Kimi Ni feru No Dakede ( I don't know. DON'T FLAME ME!!!!!)  
  
"Heero, it's been so long since I've last seen you." She said to the picture which stood on her desk.  
  
"I wonder what you're doing now Heero. Why won't you come to me? Why won't you kill me Heero!? Why!?"  
  
Suddenly, a big purple portal appeared out of nowhere, absorbing the stunned Relena into it's depths, along with the picture of Heero that she had lain on her desk...  
What did Heero's picture look like? Will Quatre find any tea? Will Duo ever get the pee smell off his hands? Who is the little boy? Will Chacha ever get to wield a wand again? Till next time!  
  
I'm done with this chapter! Big clap for me!!!!!!! Now I have to go do my book report in english since I haven't done it yet and have been putting it off for weeks! Please Review!!!!! 


	3. Taping Relena to a tree is fun!

Okay, time for the not-so-long-awaited third chappie of this extremely boring and humorless fic! Hoorah!  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing nor do I own Harry Potter. I own myself and this computer. Wait, I don't even own this computer! *slaps forehead*  
  
We join Quatre as he searches for the kitchen, in search of tea.  
  
"Where is the kitchen! I know it's here somewhere... I should have brought Duo, he could sniff the kitchen a mile away..." Quatre muttered as he strolled along the corridor.  
  
Suddenly, he heard a gunshot.  
  
"Not again... Heero! Who did you kill this time?" Quatre ran as fast as he could towards the sound of the gunshot, his footsteps echoed throughout the empty corridors. At last he reached his destination to find chaos.  
  
Wufei was shouting about an Onna, Trowa was silently staring with a look of amusement on his face, and Duo was trying to help Heero pry Relena from his leg.  
  
Relena?  
  
Heero was now attempting to shoot Relena's arm off.  
  
"Heero! I've been looking all over for you! You know how much I've missed you!? *sob* WHY WONT YOU KILL ME HEERO!!!???"  
  
"Goddamnit Relena! Im trying my hardest to kill you!!!!!!!! Die already!!!!!!" Heero shouted as he was shaking his leg in an attempt to get her off and shooting at her, the bullets miraculously missing every time.  
  
Quatre facefaulted. After regaining composure, he started helping Heero and successfully pried Relena off of Heero's leg.  
  
"Relena! What are you doing here?" Quatre asked.  
  
"Stupid ONNA!!! Can't you leave us alone!!!??? Or do we have to kill you manually!?" shouted Wufei.  
  
"I don't know, I was sitting in my office, reminiscing old times, *looks wistfully at Heero, Heero inches away from her* when a purple thingee appeared and brought me here, and I found myself beside Heero! This must be destiny! *eyes sparkle*"  
  
"Quatre, please keep her away from me, as far away as humanly possible..." said Heero, whilst cocking his gun.  
  
"That won't be easy, but we could try!" grinned Duo, presenting a roll of Duct tape.  
  
"Maxwell, where'd you get that?" asked Wufei.  
  
"From my braid."  
  
All: oooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy........  
  
A few minutes later, we find our hero's leaving the forbidden forest, without Relena.  
  
"I don't see why I couldn't just shoot her." Said Heero, sulking.  
  
"Violence isn't the way to peace, Heero. Besides, taping her to the tree is much safer. There's no risk of her coming back from the dead to stalk you again."  
  
"Quatre..."  
  
"?"  
  
"Omae o korosu."  
  
"Yes Heero, I know."  
  
The boys returned to the corridor where they originally appeared, and found the boy they had found to be awake. Trowa started interrogating.  
  
"What's your name?" asked Trowa.  
  
"N-n-neville Longbottom s-s-sir..."  
  
"Do you know how to get us out of here and back to the future?"  
  
The boy shook his head.  
  
"You do know that if you don't find out how to get us out of this time period by tommorow, I would personally kill you and strangle you, being the last living soul in this school, for keeping us here with a maniac on the loose named Relena?"  
  
The boy whimpered and nodded his head.  
  
"Whoa, that's the longest paragraph I've ever heard Trowa speak." Whispered Duo.  
  
"Relena must have made him desperate to leave this place." Said Wufei.  
  
Trowa nodded and let the boy go. Neville scurried towards the library as fast as he could.  
  
"Now what do we do?" asked Heero.  
  
"Hey! I know! Let's go have some fun!"  
  
"Maxwell, we're stuck in a school of magic, in a different time period, with Relena tied to a tree which could break any time now. How do you suppose we have "fun"?"  
  
"Let's play some Quidditch! *waves a book in the air* It's a wizard game... played on brooms!" Duo grinned.  
  
"*Quatre sighs, rubs forehead* Oh well, it's not like we have anything else to do..."  
  
Will Neville get killed by Trowa? Will Quatre go Zero in this fic? Will relena ever escape? Are guns allowed in Quidditch? Ti'll next chapter!  
  
Yay! Im done with this chapter! *celebrates* It was kinda fun messing around with Relena... hehehe... anyway, found it funny? Found it corny? Wanna beat up Relena in this fic? Read it and Review it!!!!!!! 


	4. Why Relena should be kept away from all ...

I'm really exited about this chapter cuz it's all Relena-bashing, all the time! Oh yeah, the episode about the Gundam Boys playing Quidditch... that's next chapter. * Giggles furiously * Yeah... I want to make you wait a little bit longer!!!! Oh well, so here's the next chapter of "Heero and the Destruction of Wizardry"!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and I don't own Gundam Wing. What? You expect me to say something funny now?  
  
In the deepest darkest depths of the Forbidden Forest... we find Relena waking up from blow in the head, which Wufei had placed on her with satisfying pleasure.  
  
"Where am I...? AND WHY AM I DUCT TAPED TO A TREE!!!???" Relena struggled with the duct tape that bonded her to the tree in vain. She gave up as soon as the Duct tape started stretching to its limit.  
  
"Heero... I... I will see you again! That's right!" Relena looked up at the sky in new hope, struggling more, finally breaking free from the bonds with superhuman strength. "MY LOVE FOR YOU WILL KEEP ME ALIVE HEERO!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (Corny hope music in the background) She screamed to the forest as she ran deeper and deeper into the forest in an attempt to find the exit.  
  
Finally Relena reached a clearing, but dark nonetheless. And for the first time since she had landed in this strange new world, Relena felt insecure. as if danger was coming every second. she shrugged it off and continued moving, skipping while whistling a tune. She was so engrossed in her own filthy music-making that she soon found herself tangled to a huge spider web! Relena struggled to free herself from the silky, sticky bonds that tied her to certain doom, when she spotted it. a gigantic spider, hairy with sharp pincers.  
  
"No. no..!!! Heero where are you now??? My Heero! I shall not be killed by anyone but you my darling Heero!!" She whispered to the cold dark air.  
  
"No matter who you call, no one will be of help to you now." Said a faint voice from within the shadows.  
  
Relena faced at the dark void in fear. "Who- who said that?"  
  
One eye appeared from the darkness, closely followed by hundreds more. As the creature emerged from its dwelling, Relena opened her mouth in a silent scream.  
  
"Nothing could save you now. You will be a tasty morsel for my children to devour." The acromantula whispered near Relena's ear.  
  
----- Later-----  
  
"NOOO!!!!!! NOOO MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!" Several SPIDERS screamed.  
  
The smaller acromantula's skitted away in awesome fear. "Run my children, run! This is no ordinary human! Its- its- its ANNOYING!!!!!!!"  
  
Relena chased them until they all disappeared into the dark abyss. "WAIT!!! YOU STILL HAVEN'T ANSWERED MY QUESTION!!!!!!!!! WHERE'S MY HEERO??????"  
  
A voice came out from the dark forest. "STOP ASKING US THAT HUMAN!!!!!!!! WHOEVER THIS HEERO IS HE IS SUFFERING GREATLY BY THE LIKES OF YOU!!!!" The voice echoed throughout the trees, fading away further and further.  
  
Relena beamed. "A MYSTICAL CREATURE SAID THAT HEERO WAS SUFFERING!!! He must miss me oh so much!!!! Heero, I MISS YOU TOO HEERO!!!! CAN YOU HEAR ME HEERO??? I WILL FIND YOU AND EASE YOUR SUFFERING HEERO!!!!!!!!!" Relena screamed into the forest.  
  
Several creatures scurried and moaned at the sound of her voice. Some insects fell onto the floor, lifeless. "Ah. my sweet voice has that effect on people as well as animals. They all swoon to its melodious sound!" Relena began humming again and skipped again in another attempt to find the exit. She was deep in the bowels of the forest greenery when she heard the sound of hooves pitter-pattering, resonating through the forest.  
  
An amazing sight greeted her as she searched for the creature that was responsible for the sound. A unicorn, with long, flowing silver hair, and an ivory white horn motioned for her to follow it to the exit of the woods (probably because she was causing too much death to the forest already.)  
  
Unfortunately, this is Relena we're talking about.  
  
Relena, all that time, was staring at its glowing ivory horn. The unicorn waved its horn in the air and pointed it to the edge of the woods. Relena started to drool, and the unicorn sweatdropped. (I don't know if it's possible, but with Relena it might.) She stared at it until she whispered into the stagnant cold air, only vague enough for the creature's delicate ears to catch.  
  
"That horn would be the perfect gift to give to my beloved Heero!!!"  
  
The white creature reared its head and started a frantic run in order to escape from the lunatic chasing it through. Amazingly, Relena, on her "Heero" obsession rampage, kept in pace with the unicorn, managing to catch up with it and pick a hair off it's back, which made the unicorn run even faster.  
  
Relena lost the Unicorn after a while. But she was determined to get that long magical spiral, the crowning glory of her declaration of love fore her "Darling" Heero. She reached a clearing again and spotted the Unicorn staring at her from the other side of a creek.  
  
Relena gave a VERY fake sweet smile and held out her hand. "Come on, little uni, I won't hurt you.*just kill you and take the horn which will make Heero mine forever."  
  
The unicorn shook his head as if in a "no", and stepped back to reveal thousands of other unicorns glaring at Relena with their huge black eyes. Relena sweatdropped and ran, followed closely by the herd.  
  
"I JUST WANT TO GET A PRESENT FOR MY DARLING HEERO BEFORE HE KILLS ME!!!!! IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK????????????????????????"  
  
The Unicorns neighed in disagreement, one of them eventually scooping her up with its horn. It threw Relena into the air, and as she came falling down; a thousand hooves went up and kicked her out of the forest. She disappeared in a glimmer, and the forest was silent.  
  
It was at that moment the forest seemed to be bursting with life, and all the mystical creatures brimmed with life in celebration of the disappearance of the annoying creature to be forever named "Relena".  
  
---------meanwhile-----------  
  
Hagrid stepped out of his hut and whistled his way into the pumpkin patch. There, he almost tripped over a certain something.  
  
"Ey there lil' falla! Watttar ye doin out of yer house eh? C'mon, back to wer ye came from." Hagrid motioned to the badger.  
  
"Eh? Whe- where am I??"  
  
Hagrid gasped in surprise. "A talkin' Badger!! A non-magical one at that! Well this be very fascinatin'."  
  
The Badger blinked. "Huh?? But I'm not a badger, I'm a beautiful, wonderful girl! My name is Relena sir, and I think I was kicked out of the forest by some beautiful horses."  
  
Hagrid poked 'Relena'.  
  
"Unicorns eh? Well wat did yer do to make em' so darn angry?"  
  
"I don't know sir. One of them was willingly going to give me it's horn when suddenly they all attacked me! It must have been my blinding beauty that scared them off."  
  
"Well that explain' a lot. They kicked yer out with their horns, did they?"  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
"explains why you're a Badger now."  
  
"I BEG YOUR PARDON?? I am not a badger sir! I am an honest, beautiful, georgeous-"  
  
Hagrid handed her a mirror.  
  
"-RODENT??????????????????"  
  
Thud.  
  
What ever happened to Relena? Are the mystical animals out to get her? Why of all animals is she a Badger? Will Hagrid be able to save her? Find out in the next episode of "Heero and the Destruction of Wizardry!!!!!"  
  
Yipee!!! RELENA-BASHING IS FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Had a lot of fun making this chapter. Hope you enjoyed it!! ( Please Read and Review!!!!! 


	5. Quidditch is dangerous, even moreso with...

It's been a while hasn't it? I've been very lazy to write lately, and I've been getting a lot of flames from the people at go-gaia on every little sentence I write. sigh Oh well, that's life. But why can't people just be nice? Will it kill them to say nice things instead of things that make others feel bad? Well here's the 5th part of Heero and the Destruction of Wizardry. Enjoy.  
  
Disclaimers: None of these characters are mine. Blah.  
  
"Duo? Um...do you even know how to ride these things?" Quatre asked.  
  
Duo looked up from the ground. "Isn't it just like riding a gundam?" He replied.  
  
The boys were trying to mount brooms in order to play Quidditch, some wizarding game on brooms. Just because they have nothing better to do. Wufei kept on falling off his broom and cursing in Chinese, Quatre still couldn't lift off the ground, Duo was handling his broom like it had some sort of control panel (as in, he had his fingers stuck out like with a keyboard, and typing imaginary sequences in to try to make the broom fly.), Heero got frustrated and blew his broom up only to get another one so he could play, and Trowa...  
  
Well, Trowa was GOOD.  
  
Within minutes of leaving the ground, the gelled wonder had managed to balance on his broom and fly around the quidditch pitch several times. Once he got the hang of it, he landed back on the ground and stared whilst the other four boys tried in vain to lift off from the ground. At last, Wufei earned his balanced and grinned triumphantly as he flew vertically up and down without falling, Quatre managed to hover a few feet off the ground, Duo typed in imaginary codes which surprisingly, made the broom fly up, and Heero... Heero blew his broom up again, but hey, they were making progress!  
  
After all had finished erhm... half-mastering flying a broomstick (all with the exception of Trowa), Duo read the rules off a worn-looking book.  
  
"Duo, where did you find that book anyway?" Quatre curiously asked. please don't say from his braid...   
  
"I found it while roaming around the big castle. There was this big painting with a fat woman in it, and it was moving so I was like, 'Whoa! Holographic!' and it said 'Password!' and I said 'With speakers too! Cool!', and I just blew up the picture and it swung open, and there was this cool room behind it, and all I did was raid the rooms, and then I found this! waves book in the air"  
  
"Oh." Quatre still confused   
  
"Anyway, it says here we have to kind of play basketball, with those three hoops over there, and there are these two things called Blud-bud—bu-gu-ber... yeah that's it, Bludbudbugubers! That try to knock you down while you're trying to score... and there's this thing called a snip... hell what that does... flies around while you're playing... maybe to annoy the players? Anyway, that's pretty much it!" Duo said, slamming the book shut and releasing the balls.  
  
"LET THE GAAAAMMMMEEESSSS BEGIN!!"  
  
"WAIT!!"  
  
Everyone stares at Wufei.   
  
Wufei grunted, lifting the book up whilst dodging the bludgers which started attacking expertly. "There's supposed to be a commentator."  
  
Everyone stares at Quatre.   
  
Quatre sweatdropped and thought for a few seconds. "Hm... maybe we should take turns?" Everyone nods and mounts on their brooms. Duo took a seat on one of the stands and took a microphone out of his braid. As the game began, he donned his baseball-announcer voice and began annoying the hell out of everyone playing the game.  
  
"And that's Spandex boy to the left! And gel boy to the right! Tea boy to the hoops, fight! Fight! Fight! And Wufei gets hit on the heaaaaaaaadddd, BY A BLUDBUDBUGUBER! Oh wait.. no that's Heero's head. Gel boy swerves to the hoops with the basketball... like... thingy... aaaaaaand HITS TEA BOY ON THE HEAD WITH IT!! WOOOOOOOOO YOU GO CLOWN!!!!! Wu-man takes the basketball thingy and trudges to the other side, and the idol of Relena gets hit by another Bludbuguber!! Hey, people reading this fic are actually listening to me!! starts singing SPANDEX HAD ANNOYING LAMB WHO'S NAME WAS PACIFIST QUEEN! AND EVERYWHERE THAT WU-MAN WENT HIS PANTS WERE WET WITH PEE!!!"  
  
quaffle hits Duo on the head, knocking him out for a few seconds, thrown by an enraged Wufei   
  
Quatre sweatdropped and faced in Trowa's direction. "HEY TROWA!!" Quatre yelled, "CAN YOU BE COMMENTATOR FOR A WHILE??" The gelled wonder gave a silent nod as he took his place in the stands, reaching the microphone that Duo brought forth from his wonderous braid. And the games commenced!  
  
"..."  
  
"..."  
  
"........."  
  
"........."  
  
"............................."  
  
"............................."  
  
"................................................."  
  
"................................................."  
  
".........................................................................."  
  
".........................................................................."  
  
"sings QUATRE'S CHOICE OF COLOR COMBINATION IS SO LAAAAAAAMMMMEEEEE!!!!!!!"  
  
Trowa smacks Duo on the head with the microphone, once again rearing the braided baka unconscious.   
  
"....."  
  
"....."  
  
"....."  
  
"............."  
  
"..........................."  
  
"......................................."  
  
"......................................."  
  
"End of the first Quarter." Trowa ended.  
  
Quatre sighed. "I think we need a new commentator, Wufei? Care to do the honors?" He asked, all the while Trowa picked up his broom and started flying loop-de-loops.  
  
"FOR JUSTICE!!" Wufei proclaimed, taking the commentator bench.  
  
"LET JUSTICE REIGN ON THIS JUSTIFYINGLY JUST GAME! BEGIN!"  
  
Wufei cleared his throat and started on his commentary. "Barton throws a (toot) lucky shot into the (toot) with his (toot) and (toot) Quatre's (toot) is (toot) looking (toot) great (toot) (toot) today. glares at Duo, who's regained consciousness. Duo whistles. Anyway, Yuy throws a (toot) at Barton, and he's caught the (toot) in his (toot), and (toot) THAT'S IT!! I'M GONNA (toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooot) KILL YOU MAXWELL!!! grabs Duo by the neck and throws him into the air. Duo lands in the middle of the Quidditch field, gets hit by a bludbuguber thrice.   
  
Quatre nudges Heero, beckoning him to go on the stand. Heero glares at the platinum-haired gazillionaire but nods anyway. "Mission accepted."  
  
"Mission start."  
  
several gun shots are heard in the background, and everyone playing falls from their brooms, each injury caused by bullets from Heero's gun.   
  
"Mission complete."  
  
everyone goes unconscious, even Heero, who gets knocked on the head by a bludbuguber shortly afterwards.   
  
Will our five heroes survive? Will Quatre ever get to be commentator? Where did Duo get the (toot)-ing machine from? Why all the afterword questions? Till' next time!

* * *

wipes brow. Phew! Finally finished this chapter! I really wanna finish this piece of mine so I could brag about how I actually finished something (for once!), and because it's getting too much of a hassle to think of things that might entertain myself and the readers. Yeah...I think the whole thing will end once Neville finds a way to bring the boys back to the future.  
  
Please, Read and Review!!!!!!! 


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